XXXO -

sometimes being single is easier

2012-01-04T01:02:00.003+08:00

so my boyfriend got upset with me because i tweeted about some handsome guy. after that i told him i wouldn't tweet anymore and i swear im not but it's so fucking hard. there's so many things i wanna say but i cant. it was so much more easier being single cause i didn't have to think twice about whatever i tweeted about. now, everytime i post a tweet about someone being good looking he gets upset. i don't think he knows how pissed i am that he hasn't texted me since we argued. the best part of it all, he said "chiow". um excuse me, since when the fuck were we friends for you to say chiow?

fucking bitch didn't even tell me he was going to play futsal. i called him and he was in the car on the way home. i swear all i wanna do right now is fucking yell a big fuck you to his face.

why?

2011-11-18T20:39:00.002+08:00

my whole life i live in fear. i'm afraid of losing the people i love. i'm afraid of getting hurt. i'm afraid to let anyone in. i'm afraid of the future. im afraid i'll never be able to cope with everything. college, work - it's all too much.

my lecturer said i wouldn't have time to work next semester. how do i survive? i hate the situation im in now.

boyfriend is going out tonight. while i wanted to see him after he finished playing futsal, he decided not to go for futsal and he's going out with his cousin instead. fuck this. fucking fuck this.

hollaaa

2011-01-29T06:20:00.003+08:00

why hello there everybody.

i wonder if people still read this crap.

just coming here to holla at you guys who still read this.

meow okbyez.

much love. xoxo

ilovemycountry

2010-10-27T04:44:00.002+08:00

when i was still working in padini, not too long ago, there was this man who came in to apply for a membership card. as he was applying, he asked me why does he have to fill in his race? and i couldn't agree more. what does it matter if he was either malay, chinese or indian? and this man was malay. you can tell that he's not one of those typical motherfuckers.

he started talking about this saying that they should stop asking us to fill in our race. we shouldn't be seen as a race, we are all malaysians. as he was talking, i said "they should do the same for our identification cards then" because we're catogorized as malay or non-malay. aren't we supposed to be fulfilling 1Malaysia? what does it matter if we're not malay? and i think it's bull that malays get priority in everything. they weren't the only ones who built this country.

i think the non-malays would gladly go back to "where they came from" cause we weren't born in malaysia. we didn't stay here our whole lives. we're just immigrants aren't we? fuckers. so long as our birth certificates says we were born here, we belong here.

you all can shove a dick down your throats and choke on it.

xxx

2010-10-21T05:37:00.002+08:00

since no one visits this blog anymore, i'm gonna rant on here today.

you know after years and years of knowing you, you still haven't changed a single bit. wait, maybe you did, but you sorta got worse. i don't think you realise how much you made all of your friends dislike you. the things you do and the words you say are kinda fucked up. i don't get why you have to be so insecure and you always make a big deal out of everything.

it's kinda funny though how you act when guys are around. you're more obnoxious and louder than usual. i hope one day they see you for who you actually are. also, whats up with dating your close friends fling? i remember you telling me that he's in love with her, right? and the next thing i know you were all over him.

i cant believe how conceited you are. you go around calling your OWN friends sluts when you yourself isn't any better. maybe it's time for you to see the light. you need to grow up and stop being a self-righteous bitch to everyone.

anonymous

2010-06-25T12:00:00.003+08:00

i just read my chatbox and someone left a message there. i don't know if it's all bs but idk, it just made me feel so much more better about myself. so to that person who commented without a name, you should know that today, you made someone feel happier about themself. thank you and thank you. and maybe you should leave your name there so i know who you are (:

thefuck.

2010-04-29T01:23:00.003+08:00

you tell me not to hangout with others and just hangout with you guys, but you don't even answer your fucking phone. you're pissing me off. i don't care if you want to think that im overreacting but seriously, i've had enough lah. when it comes to other girls, it's different. you'll ask me to call them. you wanna hangout with them, you call. don't fucking ask me to call them. dah lah, i dah malas dengan you. i thought this time it would be different, but i was wrong, as i always am.

and you, you haven't changed at all. stop acting like you're so close to him when you're not. baru jumpa sekali, but wanna act as though you've known each other for ages. fucking gedik man. then wanna menyibuk and get jealous when people leave you out.

fuckmylife.

solitary

2010-04-27T03:15:00.001+08:00

le sigh

2010-03-26T03:38:00.003+08:00

450

2010-03-17T04:42:00.003+08:00

you don't call
you only call when you need something
and when you don't have anyone else to hang out with
you don't care anymore

i really miss those days
where we used to see each other everyday
and make random plans
hangout with each other
never mattered where we were
or how much we had
as long as we were together
i miss all that

everyone's changed
and i hate it
i hate it so much
i want them back
i want to have friends where i can tell things to
and be the first one they call when they need to talk
to be apart of something
thats all i want
now everyone im with
i feel so lost
like as if i don't belong

i want to go back to the first time we all met
i miss it too much
guess im nothing to you people anymore

you

2010-03-13T05:12:00.002+08:00

you broke my heart a year ago, and now you want it back?

at least now you know what it feels like (:

eye candy

2010-03-04T05:21:00.001+08:00

i wantwantwant these heels pretty please with sugar on top /:

yes, i still blog.

2010-03-02T02:37:00.003+08:00

my to do list for now is :-

getting my tongue re-pierced
dying the bottom half of my hair pink
getting a tattoo by this month
dont cut hair for at least a year and a half

i havent cut my hair in about 7 months now.

/end

2010-02-06T02:37:00.000+08:00

the end of another one. i give up.

here's your update.

2010-01-31T23:45:00.002+08:00

im blogging somewhere else now and it's private.
no need to ask where cause i wont tell you.
its only for me, myself and tommeh (:
been too busy and lazy to update anyways.
goodbyes.

301

2010-01-14T02:49:00.004+08:00

things i miss doing :-

random unplanned outtings
random drinking sessions
random sleepovers
random phonecalls at four in the morning
staying up all night and talking about everything
watching movies huddled up together
sharing one blanket on one mattress with five people
doing crazy stuff at 5 in the morning

me-ow

2010-01-14T01:31:00.002+08:00

today is different.
it feels different.
but it's just like any other day.

momster

2010-01-13T04:05:00.000+08:00

i love my mommy
heheheheh
bye

hi hi hello bye

2010-01-12T23:04:00.003+08:00

today, i stoned and listened to music at the canteen for one and a half hours. because i don't have friends who go to the same driving school. i don't mind though, minus the fact that i was so tired i almost fell asleep on the table. driving instructor didn't tell me he had to teach another student. so anyways, the other half hour, this girl randomly came up to me and asked if i smoke. she saw me smoking so i obviously couldn't deny. so yeah we went to the back and talked a bit, and she didn't wanna smoke at the canteen cause her instructor knows her parents, lol.

we were friends for like 10 minutes. we walked back and she went to wait for her next errh wotsat. i have no idea what it's called. so i walked back and waited for my instructor in front of the office cause i'm bad at making friends like that.

to that random girl, if you ever reads this, which i really doubt you will, sorry i didn't say bye :p

there is something really wrong with me

2010-01-11T22:33:00.003+08:00

im not ready to be in a relationship because i dont want to keep going through the same things over and over again. i thought the whole purpose of us dating is for us to do whatever we want and not feel attached. yet, i still feel like i am attached, to you. i'm not a clingy girl and sometimes i just need some time for myself. why would you compare what you've done for me to what i've done for you? i know i don't do much and i do feel bad. i don't understand how you feel used. im so sick of this.

i don't want to be with someone clingy. i don't need that anymore. i don't understand why are you rushing to be in a relationship. it's not gonna be the end of the world. get a grip. let loose. have some fun. thats all i want for you. i know your intentions, and i may seem selfish but i want myself to be happy for now. i just want happiness. i just feel that no matter how much i explain myself to you, you will never understand.

this will be a never ending rant, so i should just stop before i say something really stupid.

GG.COM

2010-01-11T18:05:00.002+08:00

I think I've neglected my blog long enough so I guess I'll blog now since I'm free. While most of my friends are either at college or national service, I'm out everyday with other friends cause I have nothing else to do. I haven't gotten my license, which means I cant start working now. Goddamnit I need a life ):

Cant wait for chinese new year, and after that I can finally start working then I will have a life AND money. Okay screw it, I have no idea what to say.

He sang to me.

2009-12-25T02:13:00.003+08:00

Merry christmas to everyone!

With lots of love, xx.

Pain?

2009-12-18T01:04:00.003+08:00

I noticed that it takes a lot to actually hurt me now. It's like I've built this brick wall around my heart to keep me from getting hurt. Funny how I'm only realising this now but it's like I don't have any feelings at all, like it's all been drained out of me and I'm numb. It sucks because of what I'm doing to him. I cant return the feelings he has for me and it's screwing things up. I don't even deserve him. I'm not the person I used to be, even a friend of mine said I've changed.

Maybe I'm like this because of all the pain I've been through. I cant trust anyone anymore and it gets harder everytime. I cant even have best friends because I'm afraid the same shit will happen again. It's become harder for me to let people in and I find it hard to tell certain people things cause I'm afraid of what they'll think of me. I cant take the judging anymore. I don't care if people I don't know judge me because they're not significant but it's different if a friend is judging me. I'm messed up. Sigh.

Gahhh. I hate all this.

Gone.

2009-12-17T02:41:00.002+08:00

It's sad how some people can change so fast. I'm disappointed at how things ended up. I've learned to never expect much from people cause in the end, they always let me down. I'm not saying I've never let anyone down, least I know whats right. Some people are just really fucked up. For so long I've tolerated and in the end, I'm the one who gets fucked over and over again. Pathetic how some people terasa and think that I'm talking about them, but in fact I'm not. Like dude seriously, grow the fuck up and get a fucking life. I'll never stoop that low, so yeah, shove it in your fucking face bitch.

High school drama is way beyond me now. I have no time for shit like that. Toodles.

The end.

2009-12-07T11:52:00.003+08:00

Source : my milk toof

So last night Tommy called me and we had a pretty emotional conversation. I cant say what we talked about, it wasn't about us, but more like the people around us. People who we love and care about. Anyways, tomorrow is the last day I wake up at 6.45 am, get ready to go to school, sit through assemblies every morning and sleep in class. I'm gonna miss it really. The closer I get, the more I miss it. Before this I couldn't wait, but now thinking back and being in much better moods these days, I'll miss it. I'm gonna miss bitching in class with Gay, then going for recess and bitching some more with Gay and Von.

I spent six years in primary, and five years in high school and thats like more than half my life and it was so easy because everything was planned out for us. We knew what we would do the next year and all we had to do was attend classes, do our homework and sit for examinations. After this, we're on our own. No teachers to help us when we mess up, no teachers to force us to finish our projects and no teachers to help us finish our projects. We were in our own comfort zones and everyday we would see the same faces. After this, we definitely wont be seeing each other twice every week for tuitions and etc.

Tomorrow after 3.30, I'm no longer a high school student and things are gonna be different. Most will be going to college next January, some will be going to other countries, and I'll be working for a whole year. Time passes by really fast. Jeez.

Party tomorrow, what up?!

Who'd have known.

2009-12-05T16:28:00.002+08:00

Some people can be really huge assholes and it's worse when they're you're friends. Whatever they did to me, I would never ever embarrass them like that. Unfortunately they've been my friends for so long, I forgave them.

Yes, you can paste a huge "SUCKER" on my forehead now.

Nexxxt.

2009-11-25T20:18:00.003+08:00

No more History.
No more BM.
No more EST.

And best of all, NO MORE ADDITIONAL MATHEMATICS.

Cant believe it took me one and a half hours to finish paper two.
And it took me one hour and fourty-five minutes to finish my History paper two.
Honestly, it's like the first time I ever spent that long on both papers.
I'm proud of myself
T_T

Oh, and visited Ivan at the hospital today.

Talked and stuff, and he's up and about now.
(:

Spring/Summer 2010 - Platos Atlantis.

2009-11-16T15:35:00.004+08:00

I saw this collection last month in some magazine at Dome and I thought the shoes looked weird. And they look like crab claws. I still think they're weird though. But I like some of the other shoes annnd I like how Lady Gaga wore a lot of Alexander McQueen in Bad Romance.

Twitter.

2009-11-11T02:48:00.001+08:00

Yes, I have finally succumbed to this ungodly addiction you call Twitter. I was bored and I just thought I should give it a try. Whatever lahhh.

It became a lie on you.

2009-11-10T03:30:00.003+08:00

After everything that has, and has not happened, I still adore you. Boyfriends come and go, but you.. You're different. It's been a year and the feelings aren't gone. It hurts to see you with someone else just as much as it hurts you to see me happy with another guy. The question thats always running through my mind is why - why didn't you ask me back after everything we said to each other. I risked my relationship just to be with you, to talk to you. I know that in the process I will get hurt, but still I let myself get hurt. I dont want you to see me as weak or desperate but the truth is, I am desperate. I want you, so much it consumes me. I say things to hurt you only because I want to push you away and end everything because I'm tired. Tired of playing these games. Why wont you just tell me how you really feel, cause I'm ready to face the heartache and the truth. I dont want to be kept in the dark anymore.

Where art thou?

2009-11-09T02:38:00.003+08:00

Dressing up and taking pictures are a favourite past time of mine these days. I need to utilise all of my clothes instead of leaving them in the closet - untouched. I bought those shoes for my sisters wedding last year and I've only worn them once. It's time for them to see the light. They're a little studded on the right side but it's rusty now, so you cant really see them.

I want a pair of those pants.

And I'm falling deeply in love with thigh high boots. I want a pair of them. Also, studded boots. Don't have a picture of them now, but I'll try to post a picture of it up soon.

Salu.

Gossip Girl.

2009-11-06T20:09:00.003+08:00

Been watching Gossip Girl and I cant help but to be obsessed with the boys. I mean seriously, how can they be so damn sexy. Especially Ed Westwick. Ugh, cant believe he's dating Jessica Szohr. I've started watching season 3 already and finally after two seasons, Blair and Chuck are together and Chuck is effing sweet. Goddamn.

Frigging love this picture of him. *drools*

*drools all over keyboard*

Curse you Ed Westwick!

Shackles.

2009-10-31T03:44:00.003+08:00

It has failed me once more as it has done before. I'm sick and tired of it repeating itself over and over again. I'm done and I'm serious this time. No more rushing into things and no more putting others before myself. I'm just glad that it's finally over. I don't have to try so hard to change for someone who never appreciated it and I don't have to think twice before I say something. It pained me so much to have to do things his ways. It frustrated me to the extent where I could not take it anymore. There was no point in doing something that didn't make me happy at all. He was selfish and he didn't know it. It's too bad for him now that I'm no longer under his control.

I think I'm falling ill and it's not the normal kind but I don't know if it's just feelings or something else. This is all weird and new to me but I still think it's something else.

I need something to make me happy. Something that doesn't kill me (lols).

Fail.

2009-10-22T20:57:00.001+08:00

Gotta study hard for Chemistry. Or else..

Lost but found.

2009-10-22T02:50:00.002+08:00

I was looking through old photographs just now while I was resting from studying (more like procrastinating, but I prefer to make it sound better) and I saw tons of pictures my dad took that are really beautiful. Especially pictures of my mom. She looked so pretty in her younger days. Not that she doesnt look pretty now, but she was hotter way back so yeah. I think I got my passion for photography from my dad because my dad always took pictures. He even took random pictures of random things. Cameras back then were kinda cool judging from the pictures my dad took. I guess I'm feeling kinda content that I have something in common with my dad. I wonder what it's like if my dad was still alive..

27 more days!

Satellite Heart

2009-10-19T21:21:00.002+08:00

Giving up isn't the wisest thing to do right now.
But not giving up is stressing me out.
What should I do?

Complications.

2009-10-15T20:50:00.002+08:00

As you can see I've removed everyone's links. I think the sidebar is too long hence the removal of links. But you guys are bookmarked, no worries (:

On Tuesday this La Salle teacher saw me susuking and her students (my friends) were sitting with me. It was a little too late when they told me she was their teacher cause I was already susuking. Anyways, today she complained to my friend about me and she said by the look of my face, I've done everything already. What a bitch. She doesn't even know me and she's judging me like that. I hate people like her. Fucked up people who think they're holier-than-thou but fuck that shit, I don't really give a shit about what she says cause she's nothing to me. She can suck my boobies.

Yesterday was messed up. I wore heels to Pyramid and I regret. I ended up buying this dope pair of shoes. I would've bought it even if I wasn't wearing heels though. I need to stop myself from splurging on shoes. Gahhh.

33 more days!

Kasut tumit tinggi.

2009-10-07T17:50:00.005+08:00

Remember I blogged about wanting cage heels and one of them looked like this pair? Well I got myself a pair today. It doesn't look exactly alike but slightly similar. I was looking at it while my mom went to pay for my other heels and my sister asked me to try them on. Then she went, "they look nice. Okay lah, I buy for you" and I was like, "seriously?!"

She was serious, LOL.

And this is the other pair I fell in love with two or three weeks ago. Mommy got them for me and I absolutely adore them.

Today's a good day. I got two pair of heels and I'm happy (:

Day and night.

2009-10-06T19:08:00.002+08:00

I'm graduating in three days. I can't believe I'm already seventeen. It's like only four years ago I just entered high school. Time is passing by too fast. So yes, graduation. Apparently we have to share robes(?) What are we paying 25bucks for? Our school is damn stupid. My mom is going with me to see me graduate. No big deal, but she was at my sisters graduation so I guess she feels that she has to go to mine as well. My friends parents aren't gonna be there though.

To PMR candidates, all I have to say is HAHAHAHAH. You guys have two more years of school and I have only two months left. All the plans I've made with friends are gonna be so awesome. I can't wait. Don't tell me I'm gonna miss high school, I know that already. Cause I'm starting to feel it, so don't give me a pep talk on what I'm gonna miss and shit. Save it, kthanks.

And I'm so fucking pissed off now. He's been pissing me off like crazy. Fucking hypocrite much? Ugh.

Raya.

2009-09-28T18:56:00.005+08:00

It's been ages since I last posted something. Didn't feel like blogging and I still don't feel like blogging. Anyways, I totally forgot I had Biology paper 3 today and I was having so much fun during the Raya holidays. On the first day I went to Amy's place and had this awesome beef thing. Kim, Tommy, Ah Ee and I went in the evening. Then we went back to Kim's place to chill. Vix and Dennis came down and we went for a second round, excluding Ah Ee. Amy sent me home while the rest went to drink at Kim's place. Intan invited me to go to her place on Monday but I couldnt make it cause I didn't have any transport so I went to Aeon with some people. Then on Wednesday the lot of us went to Jeff's place but we didn't have lemang or anything like that. We had couscous and fish and everything. It was awesome. Shaqira invited us over to her place on Saturday and ate some more. I ate so much during the Raya holidays, it's not even funny. Well I guess that's all then. Don't really know what else to say.

I'm...

2009-09-16T20:12:00.002+08:00

Still feeling a little emotional. The ride to Meru felt like the longest ride ever. Kim, Tommy, Preveen and I were so frustrated because on the way to the cemetery there was an accident and we wanted to see Sanjay for the last time. Stupid fuckers who weren't supposed to turn out kept turning out. We finally reached the cemetery just in time to see them bury him. It still hasn't sunken in that he's gone. It's like we have to keep reminding ourselves that he is gone. After the funeral when everyone left, all of us, Kaviin, Hashok, Manosh, Kim, Jeff, Amy, Jae Haan, Preveen, Tommy, J-Shawn, this guy (lol), Wand and I just hung out there talking about Sanjay and just chilling with him. Went back to Sanjay's house for lunch, hung out there till 6 then Wand sent me home. Things are gonna be different.

Goodbye.

2009-09-14T05:15:00.002+08:00

Kaviin just called 20 minutes ago and told me a friend of ours has just passed away. Honestly, I'm in shock right now. I don't know if I'm dreaming or if this is real. I cant sleep and I'm blank. I cant think of anything right now. All I can say is, rest in peace my friend.

Newborn.

2009-09-09T19:05:00.005+08:00

My sister gave birth to Dallas today.
She was born at 8.52 a.m on the 9th of September 2009.
She's such a pretty baby and she smiles a lot.
I'm an aunt now (:

Lalaland.

2009-09-04T23:58:00.000+08:00

Reasons not to give your mom a camera : she takes ugly pictures of you.

My mom got herself a camera while she was at Canada. And mannn it is so fucked up. Good thing she doesn't really know how to use it, so I can just delete the pictures she took of me. So yeah anyway my sister is planning to do a cesarean section this coming Wednesday cause the baby still hasn't fully turned yet. She's gonna be at my place for a month. Cant wait to be an aunt, like foreal.

And today at Tommy's place was like a mini (unplanned) gathering. Baby came to pick me and ching up from my place in the afternoon and we headed to Tommy's to study. It didn't work out though cause Ching ended up frying potatoes and Kim and Ee was there. Then Kim asked Amy to come. At 5.30 Kaviin came, then Hashok came as well. And it was too noisy to study at all. So we ended up talking and just chilling. Went to eat at some place near Kaviin's padang and went home after Baby buka puasa.

Spending time with baby was just epic. I miss him so much now.

Odd.

2009-08-30T22:36:00.002+08:00

One and a half more hours left to Independence Day and I don't feel excited at all. I used to love watching the parade's on telly with my family. Admiring the colours and everything. But now, everything is different. Honestly, I wanna migrate to Canada. I'd be glad if my mom finally decides to migrate cause she's still thinking about it. This country is just too close minded. They have a frigging bong shop in Canada and it's not even hidden. Life there is just so much more better. The air is fresher and cleaner and the weather is obviously better than Malaysia's. I'm not hating on this country though. I wanna be with my Canadian family cause I don't really like my relatives here. I don't know why but I feel bad for not getting to know my grandma. It's pretty sad that she's passed on and I only met her once, itu pun when I was a kid. I would miss my friends though, LOL.

Tommy just told me that I'm on telly. Awesome stuff.

Onekissmyass.

2009-08-28T23:08:00.005+08:00

The fact that people in Malaysia are still living in poverty pisses me off. I watched a video that Elaine has posted on her blog. It's a video of an Indian boy and mother who lives in a small house. The son is asked to build his dream house as an art project. And he builds his own house when his classmates build mansions and things like that. He then gets made fun of for building a small house as his dream house. Maybe his own home IS his dream house? At the end of the video, his mom is begging this guy to not tear their house down because it is their only home. Their only place to live in. As the lady says "do you have another home for me to live in?". Some people are just so selfish. They didn't even give her a notice or something to tell her that they're gonna tear her house down. They should have at least prepared a home for her so she wouldn't be homeless. Honestly, 1Malaysia is nothing. It's not gonna change anyone. There will still be racism and shit like that. I'm just so angered by that video.

Grounded.

2009-08-23T00:29:00.001+08:00

MOTHER FUCKER I AM FUCKING GROUNDED.
How nice.
ON FUCKING HOLIDAYS SOME MORE. Mahaiiii.

Freedom.

2009-08-22T13:07:00.002+08:00

Last night was my last night of freedom cause my mom and brother are coming back today. So I asked Kaviin if he wanted to bring me out for dinner but he took me to Sanjeev's farewell instead. It was just a small gathering. Lucky I already knew some of the people there. This guy Wan kept pouring drinks for us so yeah we drank and drank. Next thing you know my head was spinning. I didn't get to eat a proper meal for the whole day and I was like fucking sleepy cause I only had three hours of sleep. Went to Mika's room to lay down. He said I was a warrior (LOL). Left Mika's place at I dont know what time, but I reached home at four.

Exactly what I wanted for my last night of freedom.

Be.

2009-08-20T22:26:00.002+08:00

Ignore the picture. I just think it has something to do with what I'm gonna blog about.

My sisters at the hospital right now. I'm gonna be an aunt in a few more days. She's not in labour yet. My mom told my sister not to give birth till she comes back from Canada (lol). The baby is supposed to be due in September though. But I feel so excited. Just felt like blogging about this. Oh, and I love Indian Street. Apart from the jam, I like the colours. I went there to get bangles for tomorrow. Am so excited :D

Hello hello.

2009-08-19T23:48:00.002+08:00

I feel somewhat accomplished. I managed to actually do something very productive today. It's nothing to brag about, but I actually did something good for myself and I will continue doing this until the time comes. I'm one steap ahead from feeling fucking useless.

World Stage.

2009-08-16T23:18:00.004+08:00

MTV World Stage was awesome. But I got really annoyed with people who kept shoving and pushing to get through. They cant even say "excuse me" or go through properly. I got so pissed off I shoved them back. There was this white guy, he was frigging awesome. He dragged this malay kid by his head cause he was pushing everyone away. So anyway, the performances were all awesome. But All-American Rejects were the best. The best part was when they performed It Ends Tonight. It was epic and Tyson Ritter looks so hot. Boys Like Girls were good as well. Before they performed Thunder, it started drizzling. And it was just really awesome.

Went to Tommy's place after World Stage for Kim's party. We were drinking till 5 something and Kaviin, Hashok, Manosh, Preveen, J-Shawn, Tommy and I were kinda hungry. So we went to Mama's Corner but they were already cleaning up. So we wanted to go to Asoka instead. But Manosh asked us to go somewhere else. He annoyed the shit out of Kaviin. Manosh was frigging hyper and he couldn't stop talking. In the end we went for bah kut teh. Went home at 8 and finally crashed. Woke up at 9.30 to go to my sisters place. I continued sleeping there till 6 and went for dinner at The Curve.

And fucking Facebook is being such a betch. I cant upload the pictures from yesterday >:(

Mardi Gras.

2009-08-14T00:37:00.002+08:00

People should know when too much is TOO MUCH. I have been nothing but nice to some people but they don't know their limits. I don't mind doing favours for people really. But when you screw me when something goes wrong and it's not even my fault then you can very well fuck off. You don't have to ask me to do you a favour anymore. I have feelings too. I'm not made of fucking stone. You could at least appreciate my effort. Telling everyone that I DITCHED you is NOT cool. Because I DID NOT ditch you. I seriously had enough of you telling everyone I'm a "ditcher". I swear to god it's not funny.

And another thing, people who judge someone before knowing anything about that person. You should just keep your opinions to yourself if you don't know what I've been going through. I know what I'm doing and I appreciate your advice. But please don't make any assumptions and fuck things up between us.

I've come to realise that I've never really had best friends. The ones who actually, really know who I am. What kind of person I can be. Someone who knows what and what not to say to me. Someone who knows deep down I am soft hearted and I get hurt easily. And that I cry at the sight of dead animals. I need someone who understands me. Unfortunately, the world doesn't revolve around me. Go figure.

The walrus.

2009-08-06T19:29:00.003+08:00

I find it so hard to blog about how I feel now. It's like I just prefer keeping things to myself. I've gotten kind of bored with blogging already, to be honest. I mean the shit people say just to make themselves feel better. People do get sick and tired you know.

So anyway, I'm sending my mom and brother off to Canada this Sunday and I'm seriously gonna miss my mom. Two weeks is a really long time and the longest I've gone without seeing my mom is like a few days.

I really like Thursdays. Cause I have Biology tuition on Thursdays and Sabash sits beside me every week. And he says the stupidest, nonsensical things ever. Like today he was chewing gum. He took chocolate from someone and put it in his mouth. After like a few chews, he realised he had gum in his mouth. Who forgets they have gum in their mouth? You just gotta sit beside him to understand all the stupidity. He makes me laugh a lot and I love sitting beside him. And he almost always contributes to my epic moments.

Didn't get to sit beside Pravind cause the teacher took the chair away to put the stand for the projector. Pravind thought I didn't save him a seat and he said I ditched him when I didn't. I would never ditch my Bio Buddy (lol). So yeah today was good.

On a random note, my mom was nice enough to let me drive out the driveway today. I'm actually getting better at driving.

Oh and I wanna watch Harry Potter again and again, okbyez.

Tongue tide.

2009-08-02T01:12:00.003+08:00

Convent's canteen day today was okay. I got really annoyed by these kids who were throwing water at each other and running around us. It was a dangerous place to be in. And it was just opposite Nush's stall. I got henna done on my right hand and its really pretty. Thanks to Nushie my sayang. It was really hot and I couldn't stand it. After it ended, we went to Aeon to watch Harry Potter. I seriously regret sitting beside Kaviin. He kept talking and talking and he annoyed me. We kept arguing and Hashok got annoyed.

I reckon Harry Potter was really awesome. You'd have to read the book to understand it actually. There were a lot of parts in the book that wasn't put into the movie. But you cant expect much from movie's based on books though.

After that we went to Mama's corner for some awesome nasi lemak. I decided to show them my IC. And we all had a good laugh cause Preveen, Kaviin and Ching showed their IC's as well. But mine was the most fucked up one. I love hanging out with all of them. They never fail to make me laugh. I had a lot of fun today and well, I love the gang. But only some of us were there.

Well, I'm really lazy to upload all the pictures here so they're gonna be on Facebook.

Scream.

2009-07-30T20:47:00.003+08:00

Why do I always end up with the losers?
People say I deserve better.
But the good ones don't seem to be there for me.
I don't know how to explain it.
It's just really messed up.

Love Story.

2009-07-27T20:47:00.000+08:00

I love this version.
If someone sings this to me, I'd melt.
Like immediately.
<3

Just.

2009-07-26T01:54:00.002+08:00

I would kiss you even if your mouth taste like cigarettes.
And I love how you smell so good even though you dont wear perfume.
I melt everytime I hear you speak.
And I cant stop smiling when you say I love you.
Baby you're just so perfect in every way when you don't even try.

Oh and, rest in peace Yasmin Ahmad. Another great loss, sigh.

Married.

2009-07-24T22:59:00.002+08:00

MWAHAHAHAHAH. THIS SHIZ IS EPIC!

Hot!

2009-07-24T19:56:00.002+08:00

I had an hour of Korean goodness today. I watched the music video for Juliette and I swear I almost had a ceisure. I was practically hyperventilating in front of the telly. I never noticed how sexy Minho's hair was till I saw it on telly just now. But what can I say, he's a sexy boy. And Key was just.. Amazing. I shall stop the fangirl-ing now so my friends wont start saying "what the fuck is wrong with you Robyn? Since when were you into Korean boys?" and blahblahblah.

I had fun annoying Ee Von in the Chemistry lab today but she tuned me out so I didn't succeed. Okay I'm blank so byeee.

Losing it.

2009-07-23T18:51:00.004+08:00

I'm amazed by the amount of people who care about me. As in asking me to drink plenty of water and stuff like that. Someone, coughfrederickcough repeatedly told me to take care and rest more. Adrian and How even offered to take me to the doctor. Honestly, I really appreciate it. It made me feel loved in a way. And it made me feel like people really do care about me. I feel glad that I have friends like you guys.

And last night was the worse and the best night ever. It was bad cause I argued with someone. But then he called and made things better. It has always been like this between us. I hate how we argue and call each other names and everything. But after awhile we start talking again like nothing happened. In the end, he made my day (:

Everything's good for me right now and I like it this way. I like how I don't have to worry about anything but myself. I'm sick of caring about what people think about me and having to watch what I say so I don't hurt anyone. I mean, who am I kidding. Some people never care about their words and their actions and they end up hurting their own friends. So why should I treat them nice when they treat me like crap?

No idea.

2009-07-22T20:52:00.003+08:00

I hate being sick. I hate being all weak and shit. And I hate that I cant move around as much as I usually do. And I also hate the headache that comes along with the flu, cough, sore throat and fever.

I just wanna lay down in front of the telly and watch shows all day and eat ice-cream.

asdfjkdlsfj;kldsfjkl

2009-07-20T20:58:00.006+08:00

We all had it coming for us.
We just never saw it.
Things end, people change.
All I can say is, shit happens.

Gerkorama and Youth Day.

2009-07-19T20:39:00.007+08:00

So yesterday I went to ACS for Gerkorama. It was okay and they had starbucks there. Went home at 12.30 to get ready for Youth Day. They said we had to be there by two but they didn't even sound check till like three or four something. So hung out at Jusco and drank a beer with Didi and Sundra. I'm not sure what time the event started though. Everything was great. The dances were awesome and they looked really hot. Seriously. Free To Fall was kick ass. The bassist asked everyone to go in front before they performed Misery Business and everyone was moshing and jumping and I was screaming. My performance was crap. I was sooo nervous and I couldn't sing. The dance floor was CRAZY. People started going up on stage and throwing water on everyone and I got wet. I think this is the best event I have attended in my five years of high school. Am not gonna upload all the pictures on my blog. They'll be on Facebook.

Hell yeah mof'o's.

17072009.

2009-07-17T18:54:00.005+08:00

I decided to delete all my old entries except the two lastest ones.

I want a fresh start.

...

Isn't it weird when someone you've been talking to almost everyday stops talking to you for no reason at all? It happened to me before, and honestly it sucks. When you thought that you both could be close friends, suddenly they just stop talking to you. Shit happens.

A very bad obsession.

2009-07-16T20:47:00.002+08:00

I love this video. Couldn't stop laughing when I watched it. I love how Key answers his questions and when he merajuk with his members. And Minho's voice is uber sexy. I'm like so obsessed with all of them. Shitttt.

Break up.

2009-07-16T18:30:00.002+08:00

The worse thing someone can go through in a relationship is when your other half betrays you. In a way that you can never forgive them. I thought I could trust him. I was so wrong. I loved him, and I wanted us to last long. Why am I such a fool?

I decided to end it. What's the point of being in a relationship if you cant trust your own boyfriend? This is so messed up. You can call me whatever you want but you don't know anything. So don't judge before you even know a single shit. I have many reasons for this but I'm not gonna talk about it.

So please, leave me alone and don't ask. I repeat, DON'T ASK.